15 Dec An Open Letter to My Son
Advice on Life
To my dearest boy,
Today little man you inspired me…. As you do everyday but today was different. It’s two months after your 12th bday and I noticed you. Like reallllllly noticed you. I noticed every little bit of progression you’ve made. The body changes, the acne, the deepened voice, your hairy legs, I noticed it all. You walked past me, almost eye to eye, with a grunt and a groan and a swagger in your step. You looked at me, our souls connected, not a word spoken and you touched my heart. I felt your confusion, I felt your frustration, I felt your emotions, I felt it all. I truly did. I get it mate….. I get where your at, so it’s time. It’s time for the talk…..
I don’t know what I did in my life to deserve you. I got lucky….. We’ve always had that special bond, where few words are spoken but our souls are in uniform. Well mate your journeys changed, you’ve been flipped on your head again kid…. Your venturing into unknown territory, it’s called MANHOOD. I think its time, time to share some light, time you got some reality checks.
Life’s about to get hard…. Your about to become a mini adult, your going to have responsibilities that suck. Your about to realise your actions have consequences, your balls are gonna drop and voice will never be the same. Can you believe it?!? Your nearly officially a man.
You’ve always been a good kid, not an angel but a kind, caring soul that would give the shirt off his back to anyone. We’ve always loved this about you, your innocence, your ability to see the good in everyone. Your the sort of kid that accepts people for who they are, smiles at a stranger and brighten anyone’s day. But in reality shits gonna get real, people are going to be arseholes, your friends are going to arseholes and your work mates are going to arseholes. Your going to learn some serious life lessons. It’s gonna suck but you’ll cope.
You’ll survive, your a spiritual warrior, wise well beyond your years, can be the calm within a storm and we couldn’t be prouder of who you’ve turned into so far. I hope with all my heart your next journey is going to be as cruisy as your last. But things are going to change, your going to develop into a real little man. Your going to get serious testerone bursts, your egos gonna need to be stroked and your aggression going to explode. Explode so much your not going to control it. But you know the rules, don’t hurt yourself, don’t hurt anyone or don’t break any property. Anger is fierce! It can be your undoing…. be mindful mate. Always remember your actions has consequences, good and bad….
Always keep your chin high mate, focus on the good in the world and keep dancing to your own beat. We’ve always admired your inner strength, you’ve got the heart of a lion but the love of an angel, you know who you are and what you stand for. Hold on to this trait for as long as you can. Believe in yourself, your destine for great things just don’t be a dick. No one likes a dick, they pretend that they do but really, they just want them to go away…. don’t be that person.
I’m raising a man that respects all walk of life. I’m raising a man that knows right from wrong, that’s strong in soul, kind in heart and is fierce as fuck, I’m raising a man that is fair, that is a voice for the vulnerable and protects the weak. I’m raising you to stand on your own two feet. It’s big shoes to fill I know but you know what, your going to stumble, your going to make some massive mistakes but that’s good, that’s how you learn…. That’s life.
Life’s going to get hard, actually it’s totally gonna suck balls but that’s the beauty of life, that’s living. Feeling every emotion, experiencing the hurt, the love, the pain, the healing, all of it. That’s living mate…. that’s what I want for you. To be your own person, to know what to waste your tears on, to know it’s your choice to react or not, sulk if you need, just don’t stay there.
I want you to experience love, a love like no other, learn that your a team, just like mum and dad. No one better than anyone else, no gender equality crap, just two people in love working together to grow in life. That’s what I hope for you. Support your partner in their dreams, encourage one another, and respect each other. They’ll hurt you, they’ll disappoint you but you’ll still love them. Protect your heart, protect theirs but know when to walk away. Have the fireworks mate you deserve it.
Respect women at all times. Your mothers a woman, your sisters a woman, were not objects, we’re not a piece of meat, society will tell you different but stand strong. Be the voice, change the cycle. We’re women with dreams, were women with aspirations, we want the world just as you do. Women are wired different mate, they’re so much more than you’ll ever see. Women will rise you up, we’ll have your back, they’ll be the support when you need it, don’t disrespect it. Never succumb to the peer pressure, never objectify a women for your own meaningless pleasure. It’s not cool…..You’ll look like a wanker. Women hold scars on their hearts, they’re fierce, vulnerable and kind all rolled into one. Be the light and comfort to a broken girls heart. You’ll learn a lot through the process.
I hope you get to travel, see the world, get out of your comfort zone, learn from cultures and people and truly explore this magical world we live in. Experiences like that will keep you humble. Please give back when you can…. it’s important to your mother. It creates balance in your life, it keeps you humble, it keeps your feet on the ground. You’ll need it when your older, your life will get crazy and consuming. It will teach you that materialistic things don’t matter, it’s the memories, the experiences and people that do.
Try all the jobs, try all the sports, you know our motto ‘have a crack’ at life, at everything. You get lazy with this….Learn it all mate, you never know what will spark an interest. Be active always…. you’ll thank me later. Be like dad, he still kills it bare footing, your never to old, it’s good for your body, it’s good for your mind.
And trust your gut….. Always. It doesn’t lie, you’ve always had that sixth sense, ever since I can remember. It will guide you later in life, if something’s off, it’s your warning, listen to it. Always trust it, I mean it! If shit gets real, if some violence is going down, just run mate, they won’t catch you. It saved my arse from some pretty hairy situations, always run, you can sort it out later. Obviously if your mates are left there, assess the situation, you’ll know what to do, you always do. Trust your instincts, they’re spot on every time.
Stand up for what you believe in, don’t be muzzled. Protect your name if you know in your hearts of hearts you’ve done no wrong. People love to gossip, people love drama, stay away from it. Sure have a winge to your mates but if it potentially ruins someone’s life, it’s not ok! Don’t be a troll, don’t ever, I mean EVER slur someone online. Putting hurtful comments online is not ok under any circumstances. That shit gets you in trouble, it’s just the adult form of bullying. Be mindful, get your facts right, as I say there’s three sides to every story. It shows your immaturity. It puts you in the dick category, don’t be a dick.
Carve the future for the next generation, lead by example for your sister but most of all have fun! Live your life, go surfing, learn a language, do whatever the hell you like but do it with love, do it with kindness and do it with balls! Mummas raising you fierce! Keep lighting up the room buddy, keep sharing kindness the world needs and being a guiding light.
Your killing it mate, soon you’ll be on your own, the strong, independent man we’ve raised. We can’t wait to see where you end up. Thanks for picking us, thanks for being the light and thanks for the journey so far.
Forever the light, forever our son.
More on coping with life here >>> The Noise Inside My Head
Thanks for reading!
Love and Light